Tuesday, January 5, 2010

I am fully aware that I have not updated in a while. So I will make this one an extra good post.

I heard a guy talking last week about all the things we as Christians love....

so I thought about it a lot ... and I thought I would add to his list.

1. Reading "Love is Patient" at weddings.
If you're a Christian and you're getting married, this is almost a requirement. Honestly, if you don't read 1 Corinthinas 13 at your wedding, there are some people who just won't come. It's the go-to verse. It's like playing "We will rock you" at football games.



2. Lock-ins.
You know what sounds like a GREAT idea? Getting like 80 immature 9th graders, get them a lot of caffeine and cookies, give them water balloons, shaving cream and toilet paper for pranks, and then lock them all in together overnight at church and just see what happens. Yea, let's do that.


3. Making music that is impossible to work out to.
I wish this one wasn't true, but it is. There are probably 3 good Christian songs to work out to. Have you ever tried to play Brandon Heath or Jeremy Camp on your iPod and get motivated to run at the same time? Maybe some people CAN run to Jesus Freak? I dunno.

4. Talking to strangers on planes.
There is only one way to witness to a stranger on a plane that is better than all other ways. It's almost as if we have been doing it ever since those brothers took the first flight. You simply read your Bible the whole flight. It will be the topic of discussion in no time. Why is it that people seem to witness the most on planes? Maybe because your suspended in the air relying on God and 5 thousand tons of steel? Well, it works.

5. The Tankini

I'm pretty sure somewhere in the Old Testament, God says that He does not like bikinis. Therefore, the tankini. The tankini is kind of what would happen if you cut a one piece in half. It's a tank top on top and a regular bathing suit on the bottom. It was orginally created in a church labratory for youth group outings to the beach. I don't have any facts, but that's a guess.

6. Chick-Fil-A

I have never been a HUGE Chick-Fil-A fan. Their food is quick, not super fast; and cost efficient, but not really cheap. The reason Christians like this restraunt is because it is a company with Christian values. They don't have a Jesus fish on their business cards and their fries are not called "trinity taters." They ARE closed on Sundays. And that is a huge statement coming from a company who still brings in tens of millions of dollars on the weekends.

Maybe I could start throwing my Chick-Fil-A receipts in the offering plate at church? Maybe not.

7. Frisbee - God's favorite sport.

I can't prove this, but I think Christians might be better at frisbee than non-Christians. It doesn't seem very scientific, but it feels about right. I'm pretty sure everyone that grew up in the church can really throw the frisbee. I like to imagine Jesus and the disciples out on the shores of Galilee playing a game of ultimate frisbee. Robes would be flying in the wind, beards flapping in the wind as they all laughed and played. In fact, I could go for a game now.

8. Not knowing how to baptize tall people.

I don't have any proof, but I imagine when the pastor sees someone tall join a baptism class, they frown a little. They know that in a few weeks, they will be up in front of everyone trying that akward "tall person baptism." The person may try to bend a little, folding their legs so the pastor can dip them in the water. After the dip, when the "baptee" is standing, I, (and everyone else in the audience) can let out a sigh of relief.

9. Turning ushers into the secret service.

There is a bit of a revolution going on in the world of ushering. I have not been an usher before, so I may not be qualified to discuss this topic, but I will anyways. Ushers are becoming more and more like the secret service. You know, the often silent but dangerous group of people protecting the President of the United States of America. How did this happen? I have a couple warning signs:

Earpieces and walkie talkies: Some churches have started wiring ushers for communication. What do they talk about? "This is tall Paul, we have two smokeys looking for 3 hot seats, I repeat, 3 hot seats." Well, now that I think about it. It sounds like fun.

Hand signals: What happened to waving down people with just your arm? I can't tell anymore if there is simply some middle row seats available or if they are escaping a sniper and found a good hiding place in the bamboo down by the river.

Oh, and if you ever see ushers stretching and warming up before the service starts. Be afraid.

10. The "eveyone is on vacation, anything goes" church service.

It's no secret that the Sunday before a big holiday, church is going to be a little different. They are going to mix it up a little. A lot of churches have their youth pastors get up and preach this Sunday. Pastors know that they would rather have the young pastor say something crazy to 400 people rather than 800. Same thing with music. You're bound to see some guy that is usually in the background step forward and play a wacky guitar solo.

11. Singing the 1st and 3rd verses of hymns.

Although hymns are becoming more rare, it's an understanding with music pastors that if you sing the whole song through, an angel loses its wings. Am I the only one that has expirienced this before? I swear, growing up, we never ever sang all the verses of the hymn.

Maybe....... years ago, some practical joke loving worship leader professor told his students that God hates when we sing all the verses in a row. Or maybe, hymn writers don't really try very hard on the 2nd and 4th verses? Just a thought.

12. Always sitting in the same seat at church.

Need I say more? I'll just skip straight to my theories:

Santa Clause theory: Kids don't want to be anywhere they don't usually go on Christmas, because they are afraid Santa won't be able to find them, and therefore not deliver any presents. Maybe we think the same thing will happen with God. We've connected with Him for 12 years in the middle aisle, 2nd pew for 14 years now, and if we move to the balcony one Sunday, we are afraid God will show up in the 2nd pew and say "Whoa, you're not Kelly. My bad. Where is Kelly? This is her seat. Weird. Guess she doesn't want any blessings today."

Scoot theory: Most the time people that want to take your seat ask you to "scoot over." Scooting over is the worst. You have all your stuff out - Bible, pen, notebook, glasses, purse, coffee, and donut. And then here comes the "I completely forgot that for he last 7 years church has started at the exact same time" dude that wants you to scoot.

Visitor Identification theory: Maybe people sit in the exact same place every Sunday so that its easy to spot a visitor when they are sitting in your seat.

And last but not least ....

13. The Double Greeting.

The double greeting is a pretty common illness that affects pastors at the very beginning of sermons. This is what it looks like:

Pastor: "Good Morning!"

Audience: "Good Morning"

Pastor: (Sensing that the crowd's volume did not meet his standards) "I said, 'Good Morning!'"

Audience: (A little annoyed and embarrased that their greeting did not meet some unspoken standard, raises their voices and repeats) "Good Morning!"

Pastor: "That's more like it"

That's the end to my long and rambling post. They've been on my mind for 24 years.


Thursday, April 23, 2009

He has the whole world in His hands.

There are some moments in life that cause us to look UP instead of looking AROUND.

I realized this when flight 1848 hit a little bit of turbulence on our way back to Chicago.

God got my attention. Quick. Suddenly it occurred to me that I was 30,000 feet in the air, and if this thing was going down- no life jacket, no oxygen mask, no emergency door, no phone call to my mom, not even my lucky underwear was going to save me. My attention quickly focused on what COULD save me. Jesus.

I remember when a US AIRWAYS jet crash landed into the Hudson river. I saw a story on CNN about it. They had both pilots and 3 flight attendants on a panel, and they were asking them all questions. One question to a lady flight attendant was about what everyone was doing on the plane. Her reply, “Silence, I didn’t see one person not praying. I was even praying.”

The captain didn’t have to come over the loud speaker and mention that they were in trouble. He didn’t have to ask everyone to pray. They just did it. People were praying that haven’t prayed in a long time. Some people may not even have known WHO they were praying to. They just prayed.

If you have ever been in a plane and hit a little bit of turbulence, or have flown too close to a thunderstorm, isn’t it amazing how spiritual we are?

I mean, suddenly, NOTHING else matters.

You’re not worried about the stock market.

Not worried about what you have to do at work the next week.

Not worried about the guy who didn’t finish your basement on time.

NOTHING.

Some people turn into the holiest people they have ever been.

We are UNTEMPTABLE by sin. The devil himself could come and tempt you, and you wouldn’t blink, because you’re so FOCUSED.

You’re not mad at anybody.

You love everyone.

You confess everything.

You have forgiven everyone.

When life is spinning out of control our natural tendency is to move towards God. And for that very reason- God gets more done in the bumps along the way than on a smooth road. We don’t learn anything when everything is good. You learn the most about yourself, and the most about life, when times are difficult.

Think about the time you drifted furthest from God. It was probably when everything in life was going exactly the way YOU wanted it to.

The Bible is a record of God’s faithfulness in uncertain times. Think about your favorite Bible story. It’s probably a story of conflict, of uncertainty, of people wondering if God is going to come through or not. Yet He always did, and still does. We find out over and over again, that God is an expert at taking care of people in uncertain times.

Did you ever sing the song “He’s got the whole word in His hands” growing up?

It’s true.

And today, when things seem uncertain or hopeless, rest assured that you love a God who knows exactly what He’s doing.

He STILL has the whole world in His hands.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Stories.

"I worked ALLLLLLL day."

Stories are almost always exaggerated.

Yeah, maybe Billy had a little chocolate on his face, but in the story? It was ALL OVER HIS FACE!!

"I told her that this is the way it's gonna be!"
really?

I think it's crazy how people change the way it sounds like things happened. A girl may ask her boss for permission to not come in on the day she wants to go out, but when she talks to her friends, she TOLD her boss that she was not going to work that day. I reality she was under the control of someone else- in her mind and her story, she was in charge of things.

"When I was 5 I made this huge fort with my brother...."

You weren't five. You were eleven. And it was not that big. People change their ages to enhance stories. They alter timelines.

"I walked for 5 miles..in the snow. With shorts on.."

It was only one. In July. Again, this makes the story better...

Now, I like stories. Actually, I love stories. It just cracks me up how people tell them. Is it truth people want, or entertainment? I think it's probably a little of both. We watch reality TV so we can see the edited version of what 'real' people are doing. Why do I like reality tv? It entertains me. But if you ask the people in the actual show... It didn't happen exactly the way they made it seem.

It just entertains us.

It's like the Geiko commercials. The real people tell the stories, and the professionals make it interesting.

It takes a performer to tell a true story well. Because....well, when they tell it, it just might not be all the way true anymore....but that's ok. It's entertaining.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

We love to treat others kindly when they treat us kindly. Human nature says that when someone else treats us poorly, we should react in a similar way...because they deserve it. Right?

"You can only claim to love God as much as you love the person you like the least."

But some people are just hard to love...let alone like. Maybe...

They just act weird.

They don't have any concept of personal space.
They don't know when to stop talking.
They don't seem to understand that you do not want them around ALL the time.
They smell bad.
They always criticize you.
They are just not socially 'acceptable.'
They never say thank you.
They don't seem to consider your time as valuable.
They never agree with you.
They have bad breath.
They take credit for all the work you have done.
The never return things they borrow.
They embarrass you.
They don't clean up after themselves.
They just don't THINK about their behavior.
They never ask about YOU.
They have a hugely distorted ego.
They are always depressed and whiny.

With some more time I'm sure I could go on and on with things that are just irritating. Things that annoy ME. Crazy that my love of others is so much dependent on how it makes ME feel. We say that love is selfless. I guess that true love is. But what I claim to show others often fluctuates depending on how it makes me feel.

I suppose that I feel rather convicted that I don't show the kind of love I should to everyone. Loving people that love you is easy...usually (there are some crazy psychological studies on this but I'm not gonna get into that...). It takes some real effort to love the unlovable people though.

I'm not so good at that. When I don't feel like loving someone, I don't really make much effort. Maybe I'll be NICE, but I don't try to LOVE them. That's not so good.
I believe we are conditioned to look for the benefits in all our relationships. Time is such a precious thing that we don’t want to waste it on just anybody for just any reason. I graduated with one very important concept from my business degree: ROI (Return On Investment) If I’m going to invest time in you, I want some return on that investment, I want to know it’s going to be worth my while to be your friend.

In some friendships, often that return is measured in the all the social advantages a friend adds to our lives. It feels good to have dinner or attend a party or walk with someone in the “in” crowd. And you can’t convince me that “in” crowds only exists in high school. I would argue that we often look at friendships with an eye toward what value they can add to our lives. Your economic status or nice house build me up and make me feel good about myself, so I’ll be your friend.

I think true friendship is when each person in the relationship realizes how lucky they are simply to be the other person’s friend. There is an indescribable joy in being with someone with whom you don’t feel compelled to add value. True friends are accepted, not for the value of what they add, but for the value of who they are. After all, isn’t that how God accepts us?

It’s amazing to think that GOD IS LOVE. HE IS TRUE FRIENDSHIP. There will never be a time when we call Him and He does not answer. What is your relationship with Jesus like? Are you taking the time to create a true friendship with your savior, or are you just being friendly?

This whole lesson is something right out of Sunday School. Any kid could tell you that you're supposed to treat others how you want to be treated. I feel like this whole concept is an unoriginal thing to write about...but if I could grasp this concept in my life, and love the people around me unconditionally I can't even imagine how rewarding my life would be.

If you think of it...try to go above and beyond for someone who doesn't deserve it today. It's worth it.

Friday, March 20, 2009

To all the lovely girls that are a part of my life:


You're beautiful.


I know that there are days when you wake up feeling like you couldn't possibly look any worse. There are also days when you wear your favorite outfit, get a new necklace or take extra time making your hair look nice and no one seems to notice. Maybe it seems like no matter who you are, inside or out, no one cares.

Don't believe it for a second.

You are beautiful, inside and out, no matter what you're wearing or how your makeup is (or isn't) done. I love seeing you get dressed up nice just for fun; you look great. I love that you're also not scared to go out in your sweats; you are not what you wear. I love that you think to do the little things; you don't have to be the center of attention all the time. I love that you aren't scared to speak your mind; you are not who others say you should be. I love that we can hang out and have fun doing nothing; it's you I like, not the things we do. I know... I'm not a guy (thank the lord), and this may not mean so much coming from me... but know that I respect each one of you, and truly love you for who you are.

To everyone:

I hope that I can learn something from each one of you...everyone has something that they can teach me. I hope I never reach a point where I see a relationship with someone as an opportunity to change them. I hope that others are able to gain something from knowing me, and likewise, that I am willing to learn from them.

A lot of times I see people, and really admire, almost envy, the gifts that they have. The gifts I see in you are maybe not the gifts you see in you... I see that you are really good at listening. I see that you always make me laugh. I see that you listen to me when I need someone to talk to. I see that you are happy to see me when I show up. I see that you are encouraging. I see that you really care how my day was and are not just looking for easy conversation. I see so much. Do you see what I see? Maybe not, but I hope that you someday do...because what I see is amazing.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Do you have any scars?

I have several from events in my life....Thankfully, most of them happened during pretty fun things. Scars are kinda cool...cuz they have a story.

One on my elbow from being tripped during a 6th grade field day. (We were gonna destroy the other teams too, so I was kinda upset that we had to stop)

Another one on my thumb from a surgery I had freshman year due to a skiing accident. And yes, one helicopter ride and ER visit later, I just had thumb surgery.

One under my knee from when my brothers and I were playing cool runnings in our toy wagon up and down the block. Needless to say, it would have been a lot safer to practice in the bathtub like they did in the movie.

I also have one on my ankle from last summer when I burned myself with a sparkler on the fourth of July. Go figure it was right after I gave a lesson to all my little cousins on the right way to hold the dumb thing.

Soo these scars I have remind me of people that I was with when I got hurt. They're good memories though, not like I was beat up by people or anything.

Sometimes I kind of wonder how Jesus feels, looking at the scars from the nails on his hands and feet. His scars remind Him of a love so deep that I can't even begin to feel what he did and even does. He's reminded of the love He chose to give to a people that were more than happy to see Him die. That's pretty awesome...

The scars created because of hate remind both Him and us of love.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Self Addiction

In Blue Like Jazz, Donald Miller writes:

“Ultimately, we do what we love to do. I like to think I do things for the right reasons, but I don’t, I do things because I do or do not love doing them. Because of sin, I am self-addicted, and living in the wreckage of the fall. My body, my heart, and my affections are prone to love the things that kill me.”


Early on, I made the mistake of wanting my relationship with God to always feel fresh and new. I wanted to have a 50/50 relationship with Him. Sometimes we do things His way, and then sometimes He would just have to trust me. Because who really wants to give up complete control? I thought it was perfect. I never thought I would want or need anything more. As long as I felt loved, it was so easy to walk around loving. As long as I felt accepted, it was a whole lot easier to accept. After all, that’s the Golden Rule, right? I made the mistake of operating my faith thinking that God and I are just going to walk around smelling flowers.
We are all self-addicted control freaks. And we make the mistake of blaming all of the “me” problems on being human. No one came and asked me if I wanted to be human. Maybe I wanted to be a fish. Nobody came to the womb and explained this situation to me. Why didn’t God ask me for permission to come into this world and live and breathe and think and feel? It’s not my fault, I’m just human.
Today I started to think about how odd it is to be human. We are stuck to the earth because of gravity. We are forced to eat food and use the bathroom. We can’t even breathe underwater. We don’t even have 100% control of our own bodies.
But why do we struggle to always understand everything? Didn’t God tell us to have faith like a child? Faith is believing in something that we can’t necessarily see. Why is it that you tell a man there are 5 billion stars in the sky, and he believes you, yet you tell him to watch out for the wet paint, and he has to touch it. Humans want proof. Science tells us if there is no evidence it can’t be true.

The good news: You don’t have to understand everything to believe in something, and you don’t have to understand everything to put your faith in someone. God is undeniable.

I do know a little bit about why there is blood pumping throughout my entire body, and why I have different thoughts in my brain. Although, its weird to think about gravity, and how complex the human body is, it all comes down to one undeniable truth: I am wanted by God. He wants me. He wants you. The same God who made all the fish in the sea. The same God who hung each star in the sky. The same God who said “let there be light” and the sun switched on.
When you finally get it, you realize what a great responsibility it is to be human. I am human because God made me human. We experience struggle and temptation and even feelings of love, because God has a plan. He knows exactly what He is doing. So let go. Give up full control. Stop telling yourself that everything has to be clear for you to finally trust. There is a God above you who never wants to see you sad, see you fall, or hurt you. He wants to rescue you from you.

Look up at the sky tonight; there is something beautiful about a billion stars held steady by a God who knows what He is doing.